Hari Gets Married

Hari wedded Gurpreet on 17th Jan 2009

Sangeet @ Hotel Coronet Deccan Apte Road on 16th Jan
was a happy affair. The invitees were just family, Gurpreet and Hari's close friends. There was loud foot tapping music and dancing and mehendi done on our hands. Food was simple with great starters. Everyone danced and it was a unforgettable evening. We missed Vidya a lot as she would have danced so beautifully. Thyagarajan ( vidya's dad) ofcourse made up for her absence. He danced with great spirit ( inside and out !! ) and joy sometimes holding Uma close. I had pretty Arabic mehendi done on my hand. We southIndians were all dressed in hesvy silk sarees with thick Jari border and Gurpreet's people who are all punjabi were dressed in punjabi suits with glitering jardosi type work. It made for a nice conglomeration of north and south dancing together. Gurpreet's family members were expert dancers while we danced like we were doing aerobic exercises. Fun !!

The irressitible foursome - Abhir, sarmishta, Gurpreet, Damini danced like professionals and beautifully too- very enjoyable

Hari gets dancing lessons from Kushagra, Giri, Shounak and Balaji

Wedding on 17th Jan 2009 at Poona Club
17th dawned a beautiful day for all of us at our house. There was magic and happiness in the air. Uma and Thyagarajan - Vidya's parents stayed with us and that really added to the feeling of joy of the occassion. We decked the house in marigold garlands and pretty mak-kolam. Bala jaya came over and we had a nice breakfast of idli, chatni, some dokla too. Lunch as usual my great sisters rose to the occasion and sent : Usili parupu curry, morkuzambu, rasam( ? ) karudam. We made some rice. Evening we all had to leave together for the venue at Poona Club.


Hari is glowing

We are waiting at the Entrance at Poona Club

Come 5:00 p.m. all of us were excited and ready dressed in our best clothes and jewellary in our respective cars. The plan was we should all drive together and enter the venue together. That was what Gurupreet wanted. We were going to get a surprise welcome ( typical Punjabi welcome I imagined with Dolak and music and all ) .

I was dressed in a very nice saree ( green and purple combination which I thought may not look good but all photos should me looking great in that saree) I also had matching jewellary ( a nice set in light purple and white stone - liked the set very much) .

Lalitha wore Green sari , Ganga wore the pink with blue border silk ( was gifted by me for Hari's wedding ) , Sachi a blue/green with big red border. Jaya as usual was dressed smartly . She always knows to drape her sari so well. How she managed with one hand in plaster - I wonder?

Hari looked radiant in a nice suit, so also Vivek as usual so smart . Both my sons are good lookers - really tall and handsome They need not take trouble to look good. The icing on the cake was my mother also coming along with us. Vivek's wedding Amma could not just make it so I was so happy she was able to take part in Hari's wedding. Bala and Jaya were the soul representatives of Raghu's family. I felt a bit saddened by that. I missed not having Raghu around - How happy and thrilled he would have been to see his two sons settling down in life.

We were at the venue at sharp 7. p.m. The Venue was "Poona Club Swimming Pool Side" The entrance was done up very beautifully as also the entire place. It was a nice spacious venue with excellent arrangements. Each and every aspect was looked into by both Hari and Gurpreet and the result was really wonderful.

The registrar of weddings was there , my dear friend Devaki and her husband Vivek, My neighbours Deshmukhs, Sanghvi Family, .. were all there. Gurpreet looked very beautiful in a rich looking outfit and she and Hari made a nice pair together.

Hari's registered Marriage:
First Hari signed the marriage register, then Gurpreet, then we three witnesses - myself, gurpreet's parents. Then the registrar made hari and gurpreet take a oath and then he declared them married. Then there was the tradinal exchange of garlands, Hari put a ring to gurpreet and the marriage ceremony was over. It was a magical moment in my life. This special son of mine whom I felt so responsible and so protective (having lost his father at the age of 11 months) - So many ups and downs in life with him - was happy for him for having found a life partner. I prayed to God that he should always be happy in life with his chosen life partner.
The one person we missed the most was Vidya- Vivek's wife. This was such a special moment for my family and she - an important part of our life was missing. Anyway her parents were with us and made up for her absence.

Food:
The menu was excellent - some starters were going around but I was too busy and excited to even try them. I was later told they were superb. There were nice tables and chairs with very pretty flower and candle arrangement. The food counter was to one corner and there was live DJ and music playing some soft music. There was hot jelebi being made and served with Rabadi and that was a hit with the guests. Every body loved the novel idea. The weather was pleasant ( a bit chilly really as the time went by) . Hot makki roti was made and served with hot sarso-ka-sag with white butter, gur and some chatni and was most welcome. There was also hot appam made and served with chettinad Chicken ( which ofcourse was not tasted by us vegetarians). Many of us thought the appam was dosa and had it with chatni and whatever else. There was also some rice ( jeera _ peas? ) item, Shahi Paneer, some dal preparation, salads etc.. On the whole The menu choice was simply superb and simple and elegant.

Guests:
People I had called from our area ( esp. Bhajan group ) stayed away as there was a autorickshaw strike that day and most of them did not have a vehicle. Daya Maya were there but Swetha was missing. Rashmi, Krishna Abhitha were there. A very welcome guest was Peggy Tumbe with her sister. She had taken the trouble of coming all the way from Bombay. Other then them, no one else turned up from Bombay( like Balraj, Kappu, Papu , Pyya... ) My dear friend Bhaviskar was there with his family as also my neighbours the khoths . As I had not invited more than these my guest list was limited to around 50. HAri's office colleagues had turned in large numbers and were having a good time. Lots of Gurpreet's parents' friends turned up. As it happens in any marriage it is difficult to meet everyone and remember their names.

Photos were clicked with Hari and Gurpreet and guests.

All good things must end. So also this magical day. For Gurpreet's family it was a tearful and touching "Good bye" .

Hari true to his adventurous nature, drive off with Gurpreet in his bullet all decked up with baloons and ribbons and a placard displaying "JUST MARRIED" We all drove away back home. We saw Hari and Gurpreet riding past in the motorbike on the highway and the scene looked straight out of some movie.

Lalitha and sacchi had come to our house early to get the house ready to welcome our new member Gurpreet as Hari's wife now. We gave her a traditional welcome. The house was lit so beautifully and looked like a place in heaven. It was an unforgettable joyous moment in my life. Leaving the newly weds to themselves in our home, we all went to Lalitha's house to sleep.

Barack Obama Wins - The New President of the United States of America

An open letter to the new President

Yes The American election is over. The results are out.

Barrack Obama is the President of America - declared on 5th Nov 2008.

Well the election campaign kicked off somewhere in April 2007 when I happened to be with Vivek at Champaign and watched on TV the debates between the various candidates. To begin with there were some 8 of them. I was sure Hilary would win as she was so charming. Obama appeared smart too.

As the months rolled by, so many things happened. Hilary bowed out. I personally thought MaCain did not look like a president till I watched a BBC profile on him and my opinion changed. My respect for him went up by several points. His speech after he lost the polls simply made me weep and I acknowledge his greatness as a true human being.

One always loved Obama's spirit. He always talked sense, looked young and charming and appeared energeticI dare not think Obama will surely win as there was always the lingering racial fear, having witnessed first hand the way Blacks are treated in America ( you generally fear them and avoid anything to do with them.. ) . Hari always said it is impossible that he win.

But today history was made. America has a black President. What a proud moment for all the downtrodden Americans who for years have felt like second class citizens. Today there is hope for all. "Dare to dream" is the inspiration I am feeling in my bones for all American youths. The message is there for the entire world for all the regions in dire political conflict - "Dare !! Dare !! Dare !!"

What tilted the whole US situation was the worst economic crisis there which was unimaginable some months back. The people of America are realizing they are no longer the rich country they were supposed to be.

What Obama should do to restore confidence of so many people ? The muslim jihadis who consider America as "Enemy No 1" ? The very white Americans who have lost confidence in their own system of governance? All those American parents , wives, childen who have lost someone to mindless war and terrorism?

Well My sugegstions are here Mr New President
1. Withdraw all American troops from non American soil and declare peace with them

2. Bring the muslim leaders to negotiation for peace. Let them once and for all feel equal and honoured

3. Cut down drastically on useless pompous spendings of state and tighten govt. belts

4. Whatever new policies are made take atleast a 20 year window of their effect for future

5. Absorb excess cash from the abnormally rich people of America into the American economy

6. Bring lot of employment opportunities for Blacks and put them on an equal footing with the white Americans . Let their lives be as hopeful and prosperous as their white counter parts. The criminal tag associated with the Blacks must go once and for all

7. Last but not the least let America countinue to be the great country it is in providing that free opportunities to all people across the globe. That is what makes America so attractive to the world

Books and Me

Power of Now
By Eckhard Tolle

I am presently studying this book- like I have read it once, acted upon the guidelines and want to rework the whole book again

Now every book I read, I am easily influenced. The books that really had tremendous influence on me are several.

Self Managing leadership By Prajipita Brahma Kumaris
This book I had picked up at Peace Garden in Mt. Abu where the centre for Brahma Kumaris is located. It is a fantastic book and I read and re-read it several times and carried it to read on the way to work and memorized a lot of TODO steps

All autobiographical books There is always some philosophy that influences one.

Made in Japan Akiyo Morita

Book by Jack Welsh GE Chairman,
Road Ahead By Bill Gates,
IT happened in INDIA by Big Bazar, Pantaloon, Future group chairman Kishore Biyani,
The Google story
Books written by Mata Amruthanandamai

Wisdom for the New Millenium By Sri Sri Ravishankar
Written by Art of Living Guruji, this book really guided me on several issues and I love reading it anytime any page.

Self Hypnosis is a book that tells you about your mind patternes and how you could get rid of negativity and plant positive thoughts in your subconsious mind. I followed the steps.

When Helping Harms the Ones you Love Book on Codependency by Angelyn Miller
which I think applies to my life . So I read it repeatedly and often and work on the steps. This is an ongoing process for me.

The habit of reading and enjoying that process is deeply embedded into my system since childhood and I am grateful for that. This one hobby and habit is a source of entertainment.
I recall in my growing up years my brother and I shared a passion for novels written by Charles Dickens and we often conversed in that English using Thee and Thou... and all sorts of dialogs and we were a laugh riot.

Past few months I was going thro' a very traumatic period in my life and caught in a trap of self reproach and self created misery. Every morning I got up with guilt, unhappiness, misery, blaming myself, bitter complaints.... I came upon this wonderful book "Power of Now" by Eckhard Tolle. Any amount of praise is less for this great author. I read and re read and I am reading the book at bed time. The philosophy of how to live life that Tolle guides us is easy to follow in life and all my unhappiness vanished.

I was absolutely shell shocked to learn that it is my very intelligence that I am so proud of is actually the root cause of all unhappiness. This analytical thinking constantly about past adn future actually creates the pain body. It is my EGO that is the root cause of misery

Some of what I learnt is here :

Today

Positive Affirmation for the day

Listen , Think, Talk

(Order is mandatory)

My Mother

I wrote this in my diary one day when I felt my mom was so ill and she may not live long. I have often been rude to her when she is sick like that. Then I repent and feel bad.

Diary : 25th March 2008

What is it to be a mother?

When a woman gets her baby, she is on top of the world. That tiny bundle born of her flesh and blood brings such thrill, such joy one cannot describe in words.

She makes all sorts of sacrifices - depriving herself of so many comforts.

I remember my mother in my childhood. She would eat only after serving all fours of us children and my father. She used to make such lovely curries and hot hot chappati that we would eat and eat till we could eat no more. But we rarely saw whether there was something left for her. But she never complained. Happily she always ate last whatever was left. Fortunately she was made up of strong basic health having been brought up in a village that she never fell ill. I do not recall a single day in my childhood when my mom was ill and we had to serve her.


When my sister Lalitha fell gravely ill once in Pune we went thro' abject poverty and hardships. All my dad's measly income went to Dr's bills. My sister had so many operations around her neck. We did not ( at that time in our ignorance) sense the grave situation. But I remember a night when there was not enough rice to cook, my mother made a thin gruel ( Kanji) and fed us all . Tough times. She would pawn all her jewellery ( so little of it ) repeatedly for my brother Vaithu's education, my sister's sickness.

I was the apple of her eye ( I like to believe that) One reason was I stayed with my aunt ( one mouth less to feed) . She knew I was taken good care of . When I went to college, I used to give her my scholarship money which she felt was God sent. Then I also taught in a near by class to fetch a small amount for the family ( Rs 25 to 50 I do not remember.. )

My grandmother ( mom's mother) often stayed with us - it means 7 mouths to feed with one small income. But my recall of my early years are quite happy. I do not recall tension filled life at all. The bonding we shared with our siblings were quite strong and happy.



The smart mother that she was - even with that terriblly measly income , sickness of my sister Lalitha - her focus was getting us all married off. She was very clear about it. And she did it. I cannot imagine today getting 3 daughters and 1 son married off as an easy or achievable task without much financial strength.

Then came our chilren one by one . My mother worked very very hard to take care of our delivery Vivek, Hari, Aparna, Balaji, Ganesh, Krishna .. All she served selflessly to all - cooking, cleaning, washing soiled clothes all with pride and joy.


Raghu's untimely sad demise ( my dear husband at the age of 36) brought my parents to stay with us. It is rather unfortunate that I failed to develop that deep mother-daughter bond with her. I always saw her as a dominating woman, pushing her views on me. Sorry Mom - I could have improved our relationship - But my own personal grief, self-pity, foolishness, ego, immaturity in facing life's challenges and winning over - All this often found me at loggerheads with my mother.

But one thing I can vouch for - I was the most caring person as far as my parents' needs and childrens' needs were concerned. We lead as good a life as possible, not depriving Vivek and Hari of anything for the lack of a father. My parents were well fed and clothed by me and looked after well. In fact I can confidently say this was the best period in their life.

Mother accompanied us in all our vacations to Chennai. She was also a very popular person. Truly she has a certain charm - charisma which attracts people to her. To this day , anyone who knows her always remember and enquire about her health where-ever I go.

Somewhere along the way as she slowly marched towards her old age ( she is now 84 - 85?? ) . struck as she was with that terrible debilitating disease "Parkinson's" she, we all changed. 15 years is a painfully long period to suffer and she did - till date.


We the children also grew old and more and more selfish and nasty to this helpless woman. She in turn took more and more medication Syndopa and became more and more demanding. She believes eating will relieve her of her illness so she demands food all the time. The truth is she never came to terms with her condition. With determination she could have won over it. Denial made her think of all sorts of solutions.

Mother, My dear Mother. I am going to miss you. I am sorry if ever I hurt you. You deserve my utmost love and kindness. You have been the most helpful person to me.

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As a sequeal to this I wrote the following too on the same day in my diary

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Managing elderly members in the house

• First and foremost is respect at all times. No one in the family should be llowed to say rude things. They get hurt easily and suffer in silence. Right from childhood children should be taught to love and respect elders
  

• Kindness, Kindness, Kindness
  

• Patience, patience, patience
  

• Acceptance, Acceptance, Acceptance
  

• Love and forgiveness
  

• Provide a separate room with all amenities, a servant , time to time food. Spend at least an hour talking and communicating. I feel Vidhya's grandmother was so beautifully looked after by her sons and their family. Thanks to having a Dr. couple in the family, they were all properly guided.
  

• Only a family where elders co-exist with all the members in the family can be called a happy and cultured family.

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I also wrote this

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A word for elders ( or people who are going to become )

This is for all of us who will definitely face these years of old age

• Take care of health, health, health.

• Eat healthy food. Exercise a lot, drink plenty of fluids, meditate a lot.

• Have a tremendously positive outlook on life all the time. Never, Never, Never think or talk negative things. That transforms you into a hateful old man/woman

• Be extremely money-wise. It is an absolute must that the moment you start earning put away at least 10-20% of your income soul-ly for your old age- just yours nobody's

• Cultivate good habits of calm reading. It is a healthy habit.

• Bring discipline in eating/sleeping habits.
  

• Be loving and kind to everyone all the time. Never say rude hurtful things. Control your speech. Better not speak than be confrontational and fight. Just be calm, cool, collected. Smile/ laugh away arguments.

Health + Wealth + Love = Happy Old Age

Of Life and Death

My Diary : August 2008 ( not dated)

What is life? What is living? To be ( like)

- Flitting carefree like a colorful butterfly

- Chirping "chew- chew-chew" noisily - "Dont-care-a-Damn" like those tiny birds that come in my garden

- Blossoming wildly like a huge flower with a crazy heady fragrance , dancing in the breeze, Shining brightly in bright sun, spreading that joy, beauty and cheer around by its mere being

- Fine gentle drizzle

- Cool chill breeze

- Warm sunshine

- Thirst-quenching cool-flowing girgling water

- Leaping frog ( ha ha hahhhh)

- Kunda flowers covering my entire kunda jasmine tree , day-after-day with that faint fragrance

- Smile that lights up the eyes of every person my life touches when he/she thinks of me

That then is Joy of living

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Joy of death

Happy end. A fleeting whiff of fragrance passed by . A fleeting thought lights up a face with a smile.

How I would like to spend the rest of my life??

This article was written in my diary on 4/9/2008. What triggered the thinking is a visit to my dear friend Ratna Patekar. She said "What will I do with the rest of my life? What do I want to do? How do I want to spend my time ? I want to start planning for it now"

Here is my take on this:

1. Live with people who love and care for my feelings, value my presence and cherish me. If I cannot get this kind of loving company, it is better to live alone - but definitely not with hatred. I love myself, respect myself to compensate on this issue.

2. Work and earn a living .
I do not want to depend on my sons Vivek or Hari for my living. I have to see that somehow I generate enough ( lots and lots is better !! ) finance and be self supporting.

3. Live with beauty Discover beauty in life

4. Live for a cause. Be passionate about something ( yet to get there ) that I should feel is worth living for. Spend all my energy for that cause

5. Health is most critical.
My recent illness taught me that if you feel unwell, you cannot be happy within. It is important to be in normal health.

I love Google

Google has made my life so interesting. I love their mail service, Picasa photo services , googleing , blogging . Internet was never this enjoyable in PRE_GOOGLE ( read PRE_HISTORIC) times

My love and best wishes to all the people of google who work ceaselessly to make it all happen.

Yoga and Exercise

Working for Health

I have developed a set of exercises which is a combination of yoga, exercises, Pranayam ( breathing techniques) , OM chanting, meditation ... Takes around 1 to 1.5 hours but leaves me feeling absolutely at peace with myself and the world. The yoga nidra ( sleep) I get at the finish of all my routines the bliss cannot be described in words only can be felt - deep deep peaceful sleep. The entire day I feel light hearted and fresh.

I follow this order

Sitting position :
1. Kapalbati pranayam and Anulom-vilom :
Kapalbati : breathing exercise. Pull in stomach muscles and forcefully exhale giving a short quick push.
AnulomVilom : Close right nostril with left hand ring finger ( next to little finger) and deeply breath-in thro left nostril. Now close left nostril with right hand thumb and breathe out completely. Repeat this alternately breathing in thro each nostril. Well Sound s complicated but it isn't so.

Both these breathing exercises are excellent for body repair, maintenance and do loads of good work for you.

I do 20 times each exercise alternated 3 times - total of 60 kapalbati and 60 anulom-vilom. the latter is tough so sometimes i do less

All following exercises can be combined with inhale-exhale rhythm. If there is any pain, do not do that exercise.

Sitting position:
2. Swing body like a pendulum - 10 to 20 times. Rotate body ( like mad !! ) 5 to 10 times in each direction.
3. Butterfly : Fold legs, draw your feet close to your body together , hold feet with both hands and move legs like a butterfly 20 times twice
4. Grinding stone : pretend you are grinding manually in a grinding stone 10 times in each direction
5. Stretch legs- rotate feet 10 times each direction
6. Stretch hands. Clinch fist. Rotate fist in each direction 20 times.
7. Cat asana : Rest on knees, with hands supporting body. you look like an animal. Now pull in and stretch body like a cat 5 times

Standing position
For mobility of knees:
8. Place palm on each knee. Rotate knees 5 to 10 times in each direction

Energizing warming up:
9. spot walking - normal
10. spot walking : raise thigh as high as possible - 20 to 50 times
11. spot running and hands oscillating up and down (flying like a bird) - go round and round - 5 times each direction
12. Bird swooning in each direction - 5 times

Slim waist:
13. swing arms at body level and swing body upto waist . Feet firm on ground 10 times each direction
14. swing arms and body up to waist . Feet firm on ground 10 times each direction
15. Hands on waist. Swing body in each direction. Feet firmly on ground. 10 times in each direction

Shapely arms and shoulder:
16. Freely rotate hand from shoulder 10 times in each direction
17. Fold hands thumb touching each shoulder . Rotate folded arms 10 times in each direction

Upperbody toning:
18. Stretch legs as wide as possible. Bend and touch toes with hand. Now swing arms and head up alternately touching toes with hands - left toe with right hand and vice versa 20 to 50 times. Knees must not bend.
19. Slowly raise legs toe touching the floor, hands above the head, each palm touching the other like Namaste pose - Stretch as much as possible standing on toes. Repeat 3 to 5 times
20. Stand with feet close together. Slowly raise arms above head, swing as much backwards as possible, body like an arch. Palms and face facing cieling. Slowly bring arms and face down, touch feet, face bent inward as much as possible. Repeat 10 to 20 times

I do the following exercises lying flat on ground:
Relaxing:
21. Shavasana : stretch arms and legs in as relaxed position as wide as you want and loosen body- relax . lie like a dead person ( ????? ha ha ha)
22. Lie normally. Take a deep breadth and chant OM 3 to 5 times with mouth closed. OM chanting improves breathing and blood circulation by causing vibrations in blood flow.

To shape up thigh area and get shapely legs:
23. Slowly raise one leg and bring it perpendicular to your body. Bring it sown to normal position . Repeat 5 to 10 times. Repeat with the other leg.
24. Freely rotate each leg drawing a big circle in air. Repeat 5 times in each direction and with each leg - total 20 circles
Move both the knees to one side. arms stretched. face turned in the opposite direction. Try to look at the hands ( try ... ) . Gives a nice stretched out feel

Flat stomach:
25. Lie flat. Raise only the stomach region . Hold it in air as long as possible ( ha ha ha) Repeat 3 to 5 times.
26. Raise feet slowly and admire them by looking at them, lying down
27. With legs folded as close to body as possible and clutching them with hands roll on your sides Repeat 10 to 20 times . Good for shaping bottoms
28. Stretch body , legs , hands as much as possible with hands above head clasped together like Namaste pose.
29. Stretch body. Hands above clasped together. Roll on your stomach ( This is called angapradikshinam - it is done by devotees in temples on hard rough stone flooring as a mark of total surrender to almighty) . Sure to cure any ailment. Since I am doing it in my room, I roll in one direction then the other 5 to 10 times.
30. Raise upper body hands and legs together. Stretch hands parallel to body Look at your feet.
31. sarvangasan: Slowly raise both legs perpendicular to your body . Hold them with your hands. Raise your head and upper body as much as possible. Only back is touching the floor. 5 to 10 times.
32. Cycle in air with legs and hands. Move your head left and right and laugh ( look like a tossing mad woman)

Ah that feels good

Following exercise to be done by turning body to your right side (lie straight) , raise body with right hand supporting head:
33. Relax. Look at your feet. Do not make any movement.
34. Raise left leg as much as possible and bring it down Repeat 3 to 5 times.
35. Free rotate left leg 3 to 5 times.
36. Raise both feet . Admire them.
37. Fold left leg at knee. Raise right leg. Look at the feet on right leg. ( sound a bit tricky? )
38. Lie flat on stomach. fold left leg and touch left knee. place right ear to ground ( try otherwise rest ear on with folded hands) . Deep breathe Chant "OM" 3 to 5 times with mouth closed.

Now lie flat on your stomach for the following exercises:
39. Chin touching ground ( may rest chin on folded hands) Deep breadth Chant "OM" 3 to 5 times. Mouth Closed
40. Fold both legs at knee and bring them to touch your body , then bring down to touch ground Repeat 5 to 10 times
41. Repeat the above exercise but one leg at a time . swing alternate legs at the knee
42. Free rotate legs ( try... )
43. Slowly raise your head and support face in the cup of your palms. Feet folded at the knee. Legs in air. Pop eyes, tongue out. Roar like a lion
44. Repeat 40, 41 Feels great , Stomach stretched
45. Swim on your stomach 20 to 50 times. Body should only rest on your stomach.
46. Lie flat. Slowly raise body, legs. hands stretched out. Body supported by the stomach only. With palm supporting the body at the side, raise the body off the ground and look up as much as possible. Body supported only by knee to feet touching the ground and palm . Bring down body slowly again on your stomach arms stretched out. Tough exercise but feel great. Repeat 5 to 10 times
47. Right leg folded at the knee, feet touching the other knee. Left ear touching the floor ( or folded hands) Deep breadth. Chant OM 3 to 5 times mouth closed.

Following exercise to be done by turning body to your left side (lie straight, feet stretched out) , raise body left hand supporting head:

48 to 53: Repeat 33 to 38 lying on your left side


Now I slowly get up and sit straight with folded legs. Takes around 45 min. to 1 hour. I feel absolutely in control of my body and do more pranayam (breathing exercises) and 7 Chakra meditation . All that in my next blog.

Putting this down in my blog made me realize how many different exercises I have developed for my body. I have missed putting down few more here...

Also I realized it is difficult to describe in words. Hope one day I can upload photos or a nice video.

Love colors life

I wrote this on 29th Feb 2008 in my diary

I have been thinking how when there is love, any happening small or big seems to take a warm glow of color.

Love need not be only that between a man and a woman - Of course that is the most fulfilling intimate relationship of all human relations - if the two could see to eye and be generous towards each other . Otherwise life takes various hues of Grey and black.

There are so many forms of love Mother-Son, mother-daughter, brother-sister, between brothers, between sisters, b/w friends. Whenever love comes across, that event, moment seems to be etched, captured brilliantly in our memory banks.

Many times we attend weddings. But when it is the wedding of someone we love, how the whole affair is like being in heaven.

Same goes for parties. I have attended several parties, some of which have left a lasting impact. But the parties of Vivek, Hari's birthdays in childhood, the new year parties at home, so many tiny happenings, they seem to be bathed in golden hue - that is the color love added.

Whenever Hari's friend Guri comes home, she brings a warm glow all around. - the color of love. Another person is our dearest Abita Krishna's little daughter- always evokes loving feelings towards her. Myriad colors painted all around by her unconditional pure love for herself and others.

My outings with Shilpa in Champaign in USA are always clearly etched in memory for the colors of love. Every scene is so sharp and colorful in memory.

A mothers love for her children and vice versa cannot be measured. But the color they add to each others lives when they feel that warmth and express them - Oh life takes the colors of rainbow.

A little child in the family - a bundle of sheer joy - the whole house held in a glow with love towards that tiny tot.

My visit to USA - all colors captures brilliantly in the camera of my mind. It is the mutual love between Vivek my son and myself that made each and every second of my stay so colorful.

Furnitures and fixtures don't make a home. It is the love which the members have for each other that brings that extra warm glow to a home.

Whenever Hari's friends come home, or all our relatives , we extend that warmth of love. It is my innate nature to express happiness and love to others. Love truly paints life's moments with brilliant colors.

In shark contrast to this glow, visit homes where there is lack of trust between members, lack of respect, care, warmth. You are enveloped in dull Grey, colors that put you off. Your mind simply erases this picture as soon as possible.

People have an aura around them- those who extend and actually feel that love and warmth towards all human/living beings. Here I am reminded of Mother Theresa, Sri Sri Ravishankar, Amma Amruthanandamayi, Guruma , Ramdev Baba , my dad , my brother-in-law Ramurthy - all them had/have this aura.

"Oh the Power of Love!!
The Colors of Love"

Beauty within

I am a great admirer of beauty. I appreciate beauty in anything and everything. But suddenly it struck me that beauty is not only external but also internal. Like what I thought was "My thought processes should also be beautiful". Ugly thoughts , negative thoughts -- thoughts that did not make me happy , peaceful, contented - those should be guarded against and filtered out. Only happy, kind, loving thoughts emanate beauty within.

March 17 2008 - A Magical Day

Morning : I got up early ( which is not all that easy !! ) . Had planned to go to temple. But went to Durga Tekdi Hills for a long morning walk.

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From Internet:
Durgadevi park is a prestigious aspects of Pimpri Chinchwad Area . over 1,60000 trees have been planted on an area of 75 acres. plants such as rain tree. Pelthohorum, Pimple, Neem Glyricidia, Suru, Sisoo, Kasid, Subabul etc. have been planted.Lawn on over 3 acres of land. has been maintained for recreation purposes.Recently 59,805 trees have been planted on 92 acres of land nearly This park Waterfall and floating fountain add to the natural beauty of this hill station.

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The place is quite a long walk from our house. Takes about 45 minutes of brisk walk to reach the hill. It is a vast hilly land which the PCMC has developed into a delightful walking/jogging track, winding path ways, flower and flower and fragrant flower beds, vast expanses of green grass, trees and trees, carefully cultivated and cared for flowering plants, a nice temple of Goddess Durga devi, Yoga/Medidation halls, gurgling water, lake, swans, water falls beautiful, beautiful. I was so soaked in beauty and nature that it was absolute bliss. What one would call soul curry - no that sounds spicy. This was such a soul fulfilling experience. I walked, strolled, sat, lingered in absolute bliss. and communicated with this world so full of beauty, so giving, so generous.

Evening I and Navi (My neighbour young pretty lively wife) went to Guruvayurrappan temple ( Sri Krishna Temple) a short walking distance: Lo Heaven opened in front of us. We were stunned, happy, escatic all in one. One lakh lamps ( diya's) were lit and placed in a wonderful geometric pattern . Tiny glowing lamps What a sight !! The place was so beautifully lit that the beauty brought me close to my fellow human beings. I loved them all. The scenery also reminded me of the night at Signature lounge on 96th floor of Hancock Towers Chicago where gazing thro the glass windows we had beheld the same scene but it was the city of Chicago lit to glory. Both Navi and myself felt so much at peace with ourselves. We happily walked back home chatting away.

Oh What a day. What Magical Moments to treasure and hold close to our hearts.

Mental Space

Mental space

Yes My Dear Friends, on earth – You don’t have to pay a bomb to enjoy infinite space – This is your mental space. It is UNLIMITTED.

You can walk, run, sit, laze, and lie down quietly.

There is an infinite spread of lovely lovely velvety green grass

Beds and beds of pretty fragrant fresh colorful flowers

There is gentle cool breeze

There is bright sunshine, gurgling streams, and steep

waterfall falling frothily down great heights with that delightful sound of water.

Snow laden mountain peaks

Serene lakes

Woods if you love that

Squirrels rabbits flashing by

Fluffy fat cats

Loving dogs

Flitting butterflies

Glistening water drops on fresh grass

Plentiful ness, abundance

Peace, Acceptance

This dear friend is each one’s mental space.

Feel free to own one. Understand that each of us needs our mental space - the beauty only limited by our imagination. Spend time meditating here as often as you want. Feels good to roam freely for a while in the lap of Mother Nature.

Sanctity of one’s mental space

You need to guard your mental space very very carefully. One bad venomous thought crosses your mind – you have littered this place. You need to clean it up immediately

At the same time someone forces their thinking on you, tries to dominate your being – they have littered your place. You need to clean it up as fast.

If I feel someone is telling something which is not for my good I say “don’t fill garbage in me”

Also you need to respect the sanctity of the space of others. How often we come across people trying to fill their thought process into you- how irritating one finds them. They just do not allow you to think for yourself. They assume you don’t know anything and they have an opinion on everything. You have one programmer pouring over the shoulder of another constantly giving suggestions, mothers telling the child ( could be a grown up man/woman too !) what to do and what not, husband/wife constantly have suggestions for each other, boss to workforce, colleagues at work to each other, some do not even leave their dogs in peace. They constantly talk and guide the poor animal who may get habituated to that constant chatter from the master.

All of us need to guard and respect each one’s mental space and live and let live in peace.

On Temple and God

There is a lovely temple, all in white marble, with intricately carved pillars, besides a serene flowing river. There are fine inlaid delicate woven works in gold on the floor. The place is sparklingly clean . Peaceful and calm. Just you and God - The deity all encompassing kindness and beauty

This temple so beautiful is your body, the deity your soul

Love all. Life is good. And short and sweet. Take care. Love yourself.

PS: English teachers and others please forgive me my grammar. This is just my thoughts penned down. My brain does not think too grammatically.

Growth

The author writes about what she feels about life. Does not wish to preach to anybody- just sharing her thoughts and feelings with fellow humans.

• You have grown when with every experience you undergo, you have learnt something valuable.
• Growth is not all about years rolling by. It is not about getting old.
• It is all about coming to terms with yourself and the world and people around you.
• It is all about ‘ACCEPTANCE’ of yourself and the others who cross your path.
• Growth is internal - within you.
• It is not about how wealthy you have become – it has nothing to do with that.
• It is when you start looking forward to each and every second eagerly like a child of your life ahead, life happening, with love and acceptance – you are growing up.

“Often I see faces around me – not happy, not contended, stressed with day-to-day life, miserable within, complex faces hiding scheming thoughts for others to gain more power, money. I see life always doling out justice in the end- What use is such a life? Leaving so much property for others but leading a horror filled worry filled gilt ridden life? “

You are free when you realize how small you are in comparison to the universe- you are a nothing , a nobody in this ongoing evolution of planet EARTH – Then you realize your true self in the larger scheme of nature.

• You have never grown up. You are constantly growing up.
• True growth requires that attribute of openness. Openness to constant learning in life from every experience – sad, happy.
  

Keep growing. Smile. Life is here and now.

My son Vivek's Wedding

My Son Vivek's Wedding

I am into the wedding preparations for the last one month and still it seems I could be more organised. What I could not manage was doing up the house - a bit of painting touch up. This is mainly due to the incessant rain lashing Pune for more than a week ..

Wedding plan:

Venue :
Vivek was getting married in Chennai on Sept 16th

The program is as follows:

10th Sept : Vivek arrives from Chennai at Mumbai. his VISA interview at 1 pm..
12th Sept : Poonal function and pre wedding lunch for family
13th Sept : The group leaves for Chennai
14th Sept : Mehendi ceremony at Vidya's house



So here it is :

Deciding The venue for reception in Pune :
First I had to decide whether we are going to host one or not. Vivek was not keen. Hari supportd me in wanting to hold one. I convinced myself "yes" I wanted one for our friends and relatives in pune who could not make it to the wedding. An opportunity to celebrate together..

Initially I chose "Hotel Vrindhavan" - It is close to our house , food is good , rates are reasonable .. but somewhere deep down my aesthetic sense was not satisfied - I checked out Kalasagar The ambience is excellent and a nice cosy hall - So I went and booked it first so we could print it in the card

Invitation:
This is the first glimpse one gets of the family's attitude to the wedding. All these days I thought a card is just an information. But when I set about looking for one , I realised many issues.. I wanted an elegant looking one, reflective of me, my family. The wordings were important. The cost factor became secondary. The one I chose appealed to my aesthetic sense. Handmade cream colour shining thick best quality paper with 2 inserts

List of invitees :
This one was tough - I just did not feel like leaving out any one but the reception in Pune cost per head. So I had to have careful head count so we could order proper amount of food - too less crowd and too many people would be disastrous. too much food and too few people would be financial foolishness.

I have zeroed in on 250 guest list .. ( + - 30)


What I want :
The wedding in Chennai - is being organized by Vidya's parents. I am determined we must enjoy the whole affair and come out as a dignified elegant group. No politics please we are Raghunathans !! "Yes" . No cheap talk, no expectation to be served on hand and foot. Just go get it Vats!!

The reception in Pune should be an achievement for our family. "Yes We can do it"


The reception in pune should bring pleasant memories for all who attend. Should be diferent in decor, food arrangements , music , video shoots .. The video must capture happiness and joy of the moment.. The decor flower arrangements should be subtle, elegant, indian, fragrant
Music should be soft Shehanayi initially.. I am looking forward to this day as it is the first time we Raghunathans go public. We have remained an extremely private family so far.

What surprised me when I set out inviting prople was the amount of good will I have generated in life. Like who ever I have called are certain to come. Some old ties were renewed too . Some lost contacts re-established. Shetty , Baby , Mukherjee, Radhu ...

I chose hotel Kalasagar an absolutely enchanting venue ; very elegant - Impressive entrance with water curtain, very artistically done up lobby, 2 spacious halls called Shehanai beautifully done up, one for the reception and one for food counters and a huge open terrace . Welcome drink of fruit punch, nimbu pani ( fresh lime juice) , 2 good starters, Good food , gajar halva + ice cream for desert and all this very reasonably priced.

Pillars with Flowers

Floral Rangoli

I arranged a florist to do fresh flower decorations and a beautiful floral rangoli . 2 pillars on the stage with huge flower bouque and hanging creepers, 2 pillars at the entrance with huge fresh bouque. we had kunnakudi classical carnatic violin as music and a sweet photographer/ video recorder Mallya . Return gifts (pretty jewellary box) were wrapped by sai perippa, list of who should be given what - gift, batchanam, blouse piece, sarees - Lalitha, Sai, Maya, Jaya, Sachi, Vijayalakshmi from Dombivilli - all were so helpful . The invities were just 200 +

The icing on the cake was of course the surprise visit of Lakshmi, Sujoy, and Dinesh from Champaign. Seeing them at the hall simply made vivek and vidya glow with happiness. Vidya looked ravishing in a pretty blue jardosi saree , her diamond necklace glittering and vivek as usual was his handsome self. They made a very dashing pair. All those who came to wish them were struck by Vidya's vivaciousness and vivek's pleasant smile and talk.

For me Balraj and His wife Chitra coming charging to meet me was an unforgettable moment. Each and every guest who came were my personal friends and so much of love, joy and warmth flowed all over.

Both Bala and Jaya were absolutely thrilled with all the arrangements and were full of appreciation for me. They were proud that dear Raghu's family was celebrating a happy occasion.

All in all it was a memorable and happy occassion for the family. I realized the value of team work and family spirit. My 2 sisters, brother, Ganga, Sai, Bala, Jaya, Maya family all stood like rocks beside me to make the Pune reception as well as the Chennai wedding happy affairs.

Pune Reception photos are here


Thursday Sept 20 2007
Well I have come back to the blog after so many days.. Much has happened . The wedding is over.